More On Love ....
This morning on my way home from the second to last trip from my old place to my new place I talked with my friend G who was hung over and lonely. G and I have been friends since forever and our friendship has been though interesting phases including the one in which I confessed to having a mad crush on him over pizza at an Italian restuarant in Boston to which he said nothing except that he needed to catch the bus. Nothing was spoken of said confession until years later while he was on tour and I traveled with him from San Francisco to Santa Cruz and asked about the incident. By way of explanation I learned that he'd refrained from doing or saying anything for the sake of his friend and fellow bandmate who had a mad crush on me. G didn't want to create problems with his mate and said in retrospect that not doing anything had been a mistake. We laughed heartily and then I told him that I needed to catch the bus back to San Francisco.
What I forget to remember is a lesson I learned through this little experience with G and that is that you never fucking know what's going on with someone else and rebuffed or embraced, loving someone, feeling love, whatever kind of love it is, whether it's plutonic, familial, sexual, romantic, brotherly, etc., etc. *is* a victory. It is why we are here and it is to be cherished and respected no matter what it seems to bring with it.
This morning on my way home from the second to last trip from my old place to my new place I talked with my friend G who was hung over and lonely. G and I have been friends since forever and our friendship has been though interesting phases including the one in which I confessed to having a mad crush on him over pizza at an Italian restuarant in Boston to which he said nothing except that he needed to catch the bus. Nothing was spoken of said confession until years later while he was on tour and I traveled with him from San Francisco to Santa Cruz and asked about the incident. By way of explanation I learned that he'd refrained from doing or saying anything for the sake of his friend and fellow bandmate who had a mad crush on me. G didn't want to create problems with his mate and said in retrospect that not doing anything had been a mistake. We laughed heartily and then I told him that I needed to catch the bus back to San Francisco.
What I forget to remember is a lesson I learned through this little experience with G and that is that you never fucking know what's going on with someone else and rebuffed or embraced, loving someone, feeling love, whatever kind of love it is, whether it's plutonic, familial, sexual, romantic, brotherly, etc., etc. *is* a victory. It is why we are here and it is to be cherished and respected no matter what it seems to bring with it.
posted by Stacia @ 1:36 PM
2 Comments:
At 9:54 PM,
Anonymous said…
This story reminds me of something similar that happened a little over ten years ago, when I was on staff at summer camp. A fellow staffer friend of mine brought a friend of hers to work there, and I mentioned that I was struck by this new person. "Don't bother with her," my friend told me. "You're totally wasting your time, she refuses to date anyone." Well, like an idiot, I obediently followed my friend's advice and steered clear of the whole affair, only to learn years later that my interest in this person had been reciprocated, and the only reason my friend issued this dire warning was because she had crushes on both of us, and didn't want to see either of us with anyone, let alone each other.
The lesson I learned from this was never follow anyone's advice, but I suppose your lesson works too.
At 9:30 AM,
Stacia said…
That's sad and hilarious all at once.
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